Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Guy in Auburn Names Company After the Kind of Guy He Is

Assmann Corporation, is the dream come true for Rick Henselmann, the company’s owner.
“I’ll be honest: I like ass,” he says.
So he figured he’d name his company, which provides accounting and tax help for small businesses after what kind of guy he is.
“I’ve always liked female ass. I know that makes me kind of rare, because most men are breast men. But Ass man sounds cooler, so I figured it works,” said Henselmann.
“Plus, it stands out.”
Other business owners in the industrial park where Henselmann is located tolerate the obscene-sounding name.
“At first, we were like, ‘well, that sounds kinda dirty,’” says Dave Bohren, of Bohren Logistics, which also has a warehouse in the area. “So we let it go, even though Rick has taunted me from time to time about ‘Bohren’. He says it’s too close to ‘boring’ and he gets a kick that his company’s name has a cuss word in it. Rick is actually kind of a dick. He should have named it ‘Dickmann Corporation.’”


  1. ..Or maybe he's fond of JONES' BIGASS RENTAL & STORAGE company??
    The world may never know...
    (or should it?)

  2. Robert thinks perhaps this sign was tampered with; I went up there and looked at the sign and it didn't look like one of those adjustable signs. It caught my eye at work (we were passing through town) so I drove back up here on my own time and got a picture of it.

    Long story short; he doesn't think it's as funny as I think it is.