Thursday, April 9, 2009

4 out of 5 Dentists Complain Patients Don't Eat Enough Sugar

Nashville TN—Chew sugarless gum? Hell no, say most dentists.
“I wish people wouldn’t take such good care of their teeth,” says Mervin Jones, of International Falls Minnesota. “How on earth am I supposed to buy a Mercedes and a lakefront cottage if all I’m doing is check-ups? That’s chicken shit work. That’s what the hygienists are for.
Contrary to what a popular television commercial has been saying for years, dentists would rather see patients chew sugar-laden gum, cereal, soda pop, desserts and whatever else has sugar in it.
“Fluoride in water was a terrible idea,” says Jack Pentwater, 35, of Akron, Ohio, who is also a dentist. “I thought being a dentist would be the easy way to the good life, but too many people are either cutting back on sugar, or brushing their teeth all the damn time. I’ve started giving out sugar cane laced with caffeine to all my patients in the hope of getting them hooked.”
Spokespersons for Dentyne, who originally made the “4 out of 5 dentists” claim, refused to comment.

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